Wednesday, August 4

Still stumbling after all this time

I like to think I'm getting somewhere in my walk with God, but he is always reminding me that being a sinner isn't something to get past, but something that has to be faced every day.

I mean, in the middle of church camp, surrounded by Gods grace, in the middle of his will; he was reminding me that I can sin. And it wasn't any big thing (most of the time it isn't), it was just a stupid dimple on a welding cable. Airgas had loaned me a Stick/TIG welder, and I had set the hot nozzle down where it could touch and melt the cable a little bit. It still worked fine, it just was "blemished".

Now obviously, the right thing to do was to point it out and offer to make up for it when I returned it. But I sure didn't want to. And its not just about the money, a new power cable was only going to be $30-40, but it was about messing something up. I wanted to get away with it and I was afraid of the consequences of getting caught.

I struggled with this while still at camp. I fought my instincts while packing up. I dwelled on it on the trip home. And despite all of that, the issue still wasn't settled the next morning when I took the unit back to Airgas. I even took Max along with me to return it, to be my accountability buddy. And I told those tormenting me, "I'm going to do what's right, and point the dimple out, and take responsibility." Course they didn't let up, even right up to the counter when we opened it up to make sure everything was there. But they didn't win that one. I pointed out the burn. And they didn't charge me anything.

A free $1,400 welding machine, no bottle rental or charge for using 20+ CF of Argon; and I still was tormented over a $30 cable. Ghah.